south island :: first half

our road trip has been an adventure in all senses of the word (although i only know one sense of the word)

* nearly shat myself driving backwards through a traffic circle on the left hand side, but since then the only difficulties has been almost hitting a one lane bridge. oh, and i never remember to put the car in park. i reach for it and grab the door handle and try to leave... still...
* booked skydiving for tomorrow. should be 70 degrees and sunny, but significantly colder at 10,000 meters.
* went on really cool rain forest walk... in the rain... forest
* slept on a mattress in wooden tent with glass ceiling. literally. it wasn't so bad except i woke up next to my sister to find hearts all over the fogged up glass. she swears she didn't make them. would have been alright but later that day when we booked into our next hotel we were given the honeymoon suite and a wink that was "knowingly".... i guess people assume with two people traveling under the same last name... particularly when your younger sister looks older.
* went in ames room. sweet as!

my first earthquake

felt my first earthquake

mag 4.4 :: 50km away

eyewitness account :: from bed bed
* the window handles rattled.
* my bed lunged toward the wall. [was happy to have the action]
* all over in a second. [refer to above]
* more like a jolt than a shake.

i filled out a NZ gov't questionnaire about how it felt.

blog advisory :: vacation commencement

not-working is tough.
i am treating myself to a vacation :: 5 weeks throughout new zealand and australia

the blog will continue on a reduced, as-internet-is-available schedule

omnivore's dilemma

if i ever buy a car again, i will get a bumper sticker reading "i eat local."

i eat local. i eat whole foods.

why?

the omnivore's dilemma is one of the most influential books i have read. it has changed my mind about eating.

i now want to know what i eat. while i wasn't wondering, i
1) ate way more corn than expected [it's hidden everywhere]
2) consumed tons of petroleum doing so
3) lowered my nutritional intake

unbelievable :: a carrot is not a carrot. they have different nutritional values... and carrots made on factor farms with petroleum aren't that great for you.

i'm not a soap box.
i am a mum and pop comedy blog.
so stop reading here.

but if you're curious, i have more facts from the book.

* each mcdonalds meal takes 1/3 gallon of gas to produce.
* mcdonalds shakes = 78% corn, nuggets = 56% corn, cheeseburger = 52% corn
* "free range" chicken means there is a two week period the bird may opt to leave the factory farm and visit real grass. they never vacation [can't find their luggage]
* farming used to be a nice circle (poop -> soil -> plants -> animals -> poop). now we factory farm and raise animal factories with 2 huge problems: how to fertilize the soil (petroleum) and how to dispose of poop (pollute rivers)
* animals can't handle factory farms or eat what we're feeding them (corn), so we chalk them full of growth hormones and antibiotics. this is creating a drug-resistant super-bacteria.

whatever we choose to eat, we eat by the grace of nature. it's too bad this is oft forgotten.

bug bomb

i flea.
you flea.

the flat was flea-fumigated all afternoon.

my “kiwi stigmata” was actually flea bites.

what a let down.

kultural xchanges

amerika :: paint dry
zealand :: batteries

new zealand rulebook

NZ rule 44b :: all buildings must be labeled with what they are

question :: the birthday scale

rule :: never ask a woman's weight or age [but freely guess so long it all stays in your head]

question :: if you tell a woman that her age must be the same as her weight, is it...

[a] a compliment :: she must be thin
[b] an insult :: she must be old

cornea-copia of problems

how i've seen the world since the belated turkey day meal on sunday

cause of glasses bow destruction :: 1/2 blue striped sweater, 1/2 my head


anatomy of my old glasses :: blueprints for my parents to find me a new pair state-side


otherwise this will be my new style

***** UPDATE *****

my two potentially new frames

ub my hero

special award :: ub [backchannel popcorn help]

thanks for the instructions on how to make popcorn with just a fry pan, popcorn and elbow grease. it worked brilliantly. my favorite part was testing the heat with a drop of water...

-- When a drop of water will dance on the oil, add a cup of kernels. --

... but then i'm a sucker for dancing...